SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
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