I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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