I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
