Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
