I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
