Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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