that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Are my feet made of real feet?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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