before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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