How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
