The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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