So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
