it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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