Your mouth is God's brothel.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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