let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
