I CAN MOONWALK!
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Just puked most of my soul out..
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