They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
