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  • fuck me in the beard.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 5:49pm
  • gurbl gurbl gurbl......yummmmmmmmm.....gurbl gurbl gurbl....yummmmmmmmm

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 12:45pm
  • Waterboarding is a form of torture that consists of immobilizing the victim on his or her back with the head inclined downwards, and then pouring water over the face and into the breathing passages. By forced suffocation and inhalation of water, the subject experiences the sensation of drowning and is caused to believe they are about to die.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 1:20am
  • Those asking what waterboarding is are probably too young to be having sex. Stay in school you retards!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 5:44pm
  • this text is so funny I am crying at work trying to keep my laughter in.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 12:31pm
  • i must be living in a box. what is waterboarding? and what does he have to do get get you to cum? maybe my man still needs some learning..

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 5:24pm
  • @ 4:08: Glad you enjoyed it. I was just being honest; I actually prefer lying on my back to sitting on a guy's face. If he knows what he's doing, though, the end result is the same ... -3:55

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 4:18pm
  • girls, don't be lazy. support some of your own damn weight with your legs. if the guy dies from suffocation, he can't eat you out anymore.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 12:35pm
  • 1) poor thing. 2) why is everyone feeling the need to express their sexual escapades... and why do I feel as though almost all of them are made up?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 12:05am
  • 12:35 or the girl could just lay on her back...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 12:59pm
  • Come over to myspace girl Sit on my facebook

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 2:32pm
  • This is how we should be looking for Osama...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 12:24pm
  • LOOL 12:50 wow i was laughing my ass off at work

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 13, 09 at 11:29am
  • watch out people, looks like we have a TOUGH GUY at 11:50. anyways, it's been way too long since a girl has waterboarded me with her vagina. i miss it. :(

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 3:50pm
  • Gotta love "girly goo". Hint:It's even better after she's downed a coulple of beers...Get 2 fingers in and rub that G-spot, make her flow. Hell, you could even make her pee, if that's your thing. I love it!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 1:13pm
  • 1:20, you do not die from waterboarding. its an interrogation device, not a torture device. the people and courts only make all these rules when their lives are not in danger...if this happend a month or 2 after 9/11 it would be a non-issue

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 11:50am
  • I'm with you 5:54! I say we throw him a party... a pussy-eating party.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 6:06pm
  • This is the funniest thing I've seen on here. Brilliant.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 9:18pm
  • i don't even need it in return, i just love eating pussy

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 4:51pm
  • another innocent tortured under bush

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 3:55pm
  • Did somebody say Snatch Snorkel™??

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 1:32pm
  • Had that happen last week!! You want to tell her get off and let you breathe, but it just tastes so damn good!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 12:23pm
  • ^ im a girl and very turned on now...ugh i need to get laid :*(

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 10:46pm
  • I would not mind at all, I d give oral for days... as long as im getting some in return!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 4:47pm
  • 1205 is soooo right. So many losers on here.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 2:11am
  • summary of my first sexual experience ever. ah the good times :)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 5:27pm
  • ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 1:25pm
  • Not sure 7:12... I LOVE going down on my girl when she's lying on her back. I make her cum in like 3 minutes... and when she does, it's like I'm drinking from the fountain of youth!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 7:55pm
  • Hell yes. Best thing to wake up to EVER. I like it even better than morning head.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 6:52pm
  • i think its cool... ive eaten girls out both ways; they respond the same to each,,, just gotta know what your doin. I'd do it any day of the week :)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 9:39pm
  • 5:54, I'm a girl. Maybe you should try one of us out ;) 4:51

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 6:47pm
  • that happens to my boyfriend all the time. he makes me squirt so good.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 6:54pm
  • none of these make sense. this website is so stupid it doesnt even let me post my textz

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 8:09pm
  • 1:39 oh no you dont need to only be on ur back you just need another partner to take you to that next level..

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 7:45pm
  • so you are saying it was not torture then

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 4:24pm
  • did she get too wild on the mustache ride? never done this, is it fun for the guy at all?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 1:02pm
  • In SIMPLE terms, the chick squirted so much all over his face that the dude thought he was going to drown...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 10, 09 at 12:50pm
  • i don't even know what waterboarding is :( but i know what having a woman sit on my face is like :)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 4:35pm
  • COULD SOMEONE EXPLAIN WHAT EXACTLY HAPPENS DURING THIS SO CALLED WATERBOARDING? please. [=

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 10, 09 at 2:02am
  • LOL... 7:55 here. Just so you know, I am very good at what I do ;) and am from the area code in which this text originated!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 10:59pm
  • Wasn't there was liek this a couple nights back? Copcycat alert

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 9:25am
  • 1;39, he's doing it wrong.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 3:35pm
  • 1:32 - i actually laughed out loud. at work. whoo hoo!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 4:04pm
  • @809 That's because this website thinks your texts are dumb. Duh.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 8:36pm
  • So guys do or don't like being waterboarded ?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 7:12pm
  • lol... i can't get off like that. have to be laying on my back.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 1:39pm
  • 4:51 I didn't know guys like you existed...Women everywhere rejoice!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 5:54pm
  • @3.55 You just made my life. loling for minutes. Also, why can't I meet a guy like any of these dudes?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 4:08pm
  • @2:02 google dude. it's a torture device, basically. makes you think you're drowning.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 10, 09 at 3:43am
  • 7:55...will u marry me?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 9, 09 at 10:54pm
  • waterboarding is a form of torture, retards, not some kinky sex act. gooogle?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 5:34pm
  • she was just trying to give u a shower

    Submitted by sirclutchalot on Jan 9, 12 at 11:35pm
  • alcohol and genitalia don't mix, but to each their own I guess. :P

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 1:28pm
  • And I'll tell her anything she wants to hear.

    Submitted by BigCrank on Jun 7, 11 at 6:48am
  • 4:51 let's get married immediately.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 6:25pm
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