and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
