I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
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She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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