Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
