I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
