i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
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