is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
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