I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
