im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I wish there were birth control emojis
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
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