that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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