normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
