i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
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