dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
