it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
you would pick up someone in the library
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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