i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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