I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
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