DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
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