Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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