You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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