come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
