id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize