Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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