every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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