Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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