physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
