That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
honey bunches of taint.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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