is your mom at the bar?
garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
