omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Randomize