Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
