He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
