hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
