i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
My dick has a subreddit
you never un-have a 4some
Randomize
