How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize