I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
