i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
