It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
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