If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
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