i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
